I want to go skinny dipping.

Hello, my wonderful newsletter audience. If you’re new here, hi. My name is Najwa, and i write whatever is in my head. If you’re a returning subscriber, no hi for you today, because you people have bad behavior. None of you asked of me when i left, clearly you all hate me.

Where do i start from? Eid.

This year didn’t feel like eid. The excitement wasn’t there, at least not for me, and that’s because my tailor fucked up. I want to say that God will punish her for robbing me of the joy of being beautiful and happy on eid, but I’m a changed woman, so I won’t say that God will punish her.

For context, my usual tailor that’s tested and trusted decided to get married one random Saturday, and she was taking a well deserved break, but I didn’t find out until it was two weeks to eid.

I tried to stay calm, and I started calling people. Most of them weren’t taking new clothes, because eid was two weeks away and they already had a lot to do. I was about to give up, but i decided to take a leap of faith and try one of the plenty tailors that had their shop at the roadside, and that is where i fucked up.

Even now, I don’t know what i was thinking.

The woman promised me heaven and earth, and that my dress would be ready before eid. One week to eid, i called her to ask how it was going, and she assured me that my dress was almost ready. Two days to eid, she called to tell me my dress was ready.

I wasn’t home, so I had them deliver the dress. I got back home the night before eid, and i decided to try my dress on. I wept. That’s all I’m going to say. For some reason, i was able to zip the dress up, but I couldn’t reach the zip to undo it after wearing it, so i slept in the ugly, uncomfortable eid dress after crying myself to stupor.

I stayed in bed throughout the day, and the only highlight was the food. And apparently I’ve reached the age where nobody squeezes “biscuit money” into my hand again. I hate growing up💔

Anyway, the other day my friend was telling me about how she went skinny dipping with her cousin, and how fun it was. I was about to say she should take me the next time she’s going, what’s wrong with a little adventure? But what if a shark bites my bumbum and i die?

If I drown, it’ll be easy to tell people that Najwa went to swim, and she drowned. But if shark bites my bumbum, how will they tell people that I went to swim naked, and shark bit my bumbum?

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BOOKS AND ORISIRISI

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I’m currently reading I’m Glad My Mum Died by Jennette McCurdy. It’s the first book on my 2025 TBR, ignore the fact that i just started the first book on my TBR and it’s already April, I’m going through a lot.

I have this thing where I cannot start a new book when i’m reading one, I’ll end up leaving one for the other, but I’m so tempted to try it.

I keep seeing good reviews of The Fishermen by Chigozie Obioma on my FYP, and i want to read it soo bad, but i also like I’m Glad My Mum Died, so I’m trying to hold on to it. If you have any suggestions to add to my TBR, let me know. If I don’t like it, I’ll find you and show you pepper.