I am in pain.

Extreme, utmost pain.

Hello, my wonderful newsletter audience. Today, I am in pain.

This morning, I decided to check out new lands around dams, bridges, mortuary and dumps-you guys know I sell aesthetic lands-so I dressed up, looking cute and sexy, then proceeded to junction to carry bus. I should've even suspected something when I quickly saw bus, as I no too get good luck, anyways, I got in the bus and we sha started going, we now got to one bus stop, and the agbero came down to usher people in, note that the agbero was the typical horrible agbero, lips as black as charcoal, dirty, torn shirt and an equally unappealing trouser, and horrible breath. This one was very bad, oloun.

So this agbero got down, and me, innocent Najwa, decided to put my head in the window side, like they do in all those aesthetic pictures, I take aesthetics very serious, yes, but guys, guess what? The agbero kissed me!! *insert millions of crying emojis* but I could not talk because he was huge, and he had clearly been smoking igbo, but me? I'm tiny. Plus, fine boy dey front and I didn't want to cry, so he would not think I'm uncool.

Me after the agbero kissed me.

Also me, after noticing fine boy.

The foolish, bastard agbero.

In conclusion, a lot of people are mad, and you guys have to comtribute money to buy car for me, because I don't think I can ever enter bus again. It is Tesla that I want, plix and tenk you. Your traumatised sweetheart, Najwa.